Sunday, December 4, 2011

Hold On! It's Gonna Be a Bumpy Ride!


 Riding the Cyclone Fine Art Print - Chris Lord
Last night I dreamt I was on a roller coaster.  It was just like the dreams I have occasionally of elevators that go anywhere but up or down, dreams of frighteningly steep escalators, swimming in murky gym pools, or rushing through a strange airport to catch an international flight w/o having taken enough traveling money. 

While I've never ridden the legendary Cyclone at Coney Island, I do remember standing on line to ride The Loch Ness Monster roller coaster at Busch Gardens in Williamsburg, VA over and over and over again when I was a teenager.  It was crazy fun to be inched up a steep 13-story incline only to be plunged sadistically down 114 feet, whipped around a tight corner, pelted through a dark and smoky tunnel, then flipped upside down in a loopdy-loop before the ride (and my screaming bloody murder) ended.  The sooner I jumped back on line to do it again, the less afraid I was.  That's how I was as a teen; if you're anything like me, once you pass 40--even 30-- you might decide that your life is plenty exciting as it is, and roller coasters are no longer needed or remotely considered fun.  You have a blood pressure to regulate!

When everything around me seems to be in turmoil yet I've managed to maintain this calm exterior, it's funny how it all comes out in the wash...or rather the dreams.  I know now that these dreams are all about fear of success and failure, losing control, inadequacy, uncertainty of direction, and fear of the unknown.  Do all artists dream this way?  

I'm convinced that life is always going to be full of ups and downs, stallings, unplanned detours and winding up in fabulous, unexpected places.  I wish I could learn to just throw up my hands and enjoy the ride.  I could sure use a hefty dose of crazy teen courage for whatever's coming down the pike!  The kind of courage that's so busy enjoying itself that fear can barely stand a chance; can barely get a dream in edgewise.

4 comments:

  1. I loved roller coasters as a kid and into my twenties, but you couldn't pay me to get on one now! I miss that fearlessness too!

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  2. Annette, I know what you mean. Today, my idea of fearlessness is more like making a dreaded business call, leaving food on my plate, or embracing social networking! LOL

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  3. No you are not alone. While Teen fearlessness can be missed sometimes, I feel it is much better that you understand what you are feeling so that you are better equipped to to face whatever comes your way.

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  4. Sewlutions, that's a fresh perspective to take!

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